On December 4, 2020, I eagerly scrolled through Dan Blank’s Friday newsletter. Dan is a creativity guru. He’s a lot like Freud because he pays attention to reality. He’s helped me find my creative grove and I am grateful for his influence in my life. I’ve been in his Mastermind groups and recently worked with him on planning my book launch.

This week, Dan’s post opened celebrating KJ Dell’Antonia’s book, The Chicken Sisters. It was selected as Reese Witherspoon’s book club pick. Dan worked with KJ and pointed out that Witherspoon has an Instagram following of 25 Million. When the green-eyed monster threatened to take over my mind, I remembered Buddhist teachers’ advice: gratitude is the antidote for jealousy. I quickly give thanks for my 195 Instagram followers and keep scrolling.

Next Dan wrote about Sarah Hays Coomer’s new book, The Habit Trip. She’s another writer he’s worked with. A picture of her with stacks of books that she is signing also tickles my green-eyed monster. I wish he was writing about me but I begin to think about purchasing these books because I know how happy that would make the authors and it makes me feel better. I keep scrolling and then read these words from Dan:

“Earlier this Fall, another writer I worked with released her book, and her story has endlessly inspired me. When Nicky Mendenhall was 65 she embraced the idea of going to psychoanalysis. This turned into an incredible intellectual and personal journey that was challenging and fulfilling.

Then she decides to write about the experience, which is her memoir Fear, Folly and Freud: A Psychotherapist in Psychoanalysis. The date of publication? Her birthday, a decade later when she turned 75.

For the launch, she created a Zoom event where her readers, friends, and family attended. I mean, just look at this photo, people celebrating what Nicky has created:

It was such a lovely conversation, filled with laughter, questions, and insights. At this culmination of an amazing process, Nicky talked about the next book she is excited to write. It was a reminder that this work of creating and sharing is a process that follows us through life.

Her spirit throughout all of this has been incredible, truly embracing what it means to grow and create. To fill her life with possibility. Congratulations on everything Nicky!”

Can you imagine how I felt reading this? He worked with me when I whined and resisted his suggestions. When I shot off frantic emails to him with subjects like, “Freaking out about Mail Chimp” or “Word Press won’t open – help!” And still, he said all these nice things about me. He saw all of me and shared the good parts with his readers. It feels good to be seen.



Do you know the joy of being seen? Can you give it to another person as a gift?

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6 Responses

  1. How wonderful to witness yourself being seen, Nicky! So many will see you through your book and your book will help people see themselves more clearly!
    “ThIs process of creating and sharing” does “follow us through life.”

    • Thanks, Diane – I felt seen when you interviewed me! You are so supportive! And you inspire me to be a better writer!

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