After fifteen weeks (counted em’) I got my hair cut. Usually I visit the salon every five weeks so you can imagine how long, bushy, and out of control my thick bangs were.

I read the salon’s new rules on their website: be quiet while being shampooed and keep mask on at all times. Sounds reasonable. I can do that. No problem.



Contemplative shampoo over, comfortably seated in the beautician’s swivel chair, I see myself in the mirror. My hair. I stare at my hair. It is so white. I can’t believe how white it is. Is this the result of being quarantined?

Slowly it dawns on me: This is my first haircut since cataract surgery. My hair color looks different because I am now looking through clear lenses! It is so white! I thought I had been seeing clearly before but it was obvious I hadn’t been. I believed that I was close to being a blonde. No doubt about it though, this is white hair.



I remembered reading that Sigmund Freud wrote about a friend of his who displayed heroic clarity. Freud explained his friend was not only able to see clearly, he was rational, and allowed himself to apprehend reality fully with all his senses.

Heroic clarity – was seeing my hair it’s true color heroic clarity? I think so. I know that writing a memoir about the personal growth I experienced in Freudian psychoanalysis has reinforced how clouded the lenses in the past have been. They discolored my reality and please know that I’m not just talking about cataracts!

In the beauty salon, the reality of my white hair was stark, hard to miss. The reality of what happens in personal growth is often easy to miss.

Maybe it takes heroic clarity to know when we grow and change. Is there a change that you have made that you are proud of? Don’t be shy, write to us as anonymous if you must but let us know what you have accomplished and we will celebrate with you!

IMAGE: If you take a look at the image for today, you will see that the background on which my white hair is resting is probably what my hair used to look like to me when I looked through the clouded lenses.

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10 Responses

  1. Your seeing clearly after eye surgery made me think about my lasik surgery 20 years ago. I remember seeing how dirty the shower floor was and laughing to myself.

    I’m prone to blame others too. I tend to automatically believe that others caused whatever is amiss. I am able to catch myself often to avoid pointing a finger when it is actually me.

    • Hi Nolan – Good to hear from you. Funny you remember so clearly the dirty shower floor twenty years
      ago!

      Glad to hear I’m not the only one who tends to blame. I hope that I don’t point fingers either.

      Thanks so much for reading and commenting.

  2. “heroic clarity” — I love the concept! It’s such a great alternative to the rampant “create your own reality” of the post-truth era in which we find ourselves.

    • Anna -The phrase – “create your own reality”- does seem to pale in the face of heroic clarity! Thanks for drawing
      my attention to this!

      I appreciate your reading and commenting!

  3. Thanks, Nicky. You pack a lot of meaning into getting a hair cut…love your insights (and white hair, sister!)

    • You are most welcome Jacqueline – I feel honored to be your white haired sister!

      I have loved watching you online preach – you pack a lot of meaning into your messages too!

      Thanks for reading and commenting – means a lot to me!

  4. Hi Nicky! My sister recently had cataract surgery and expressed a sentiment. I am going to pick up my first hearing aid on Wednesday–I wonder if hearing more things will bring me heroic clarity–will keep you posted!

    • Hi Diane,
      It will be interesting to see what an improvement in hearing will bring for you.
      I think of you as a woman who already has heroic clarity so it may be difficult for
      us to tell!But bringing mindful awareness will help!

      Thanks for reading and commenting.

  5. Oh, I love that you are seeing clearly these days, Niki! Your hair color is magnificent, and becomes you!
    I’ve had a recent revelation about my beliefs around our President! I was on the “Never Trump” wagon, believing the News and being programmed without question! I had him pegged, and believed the narrative that so deftly portrayed him as a chauvinist Pig who had his own interest in mind first I. had become complacent and my critical thinking skills were buried under this ‘c’ word… until information began reaching me that revealed that President Trump is the Frog that we must l kiss. This new heroic clarity has been shocking, and I swear, now when I listen to him, I hear a strong, heroic, caring man with huge resolve to bring our country back from the brink. I have memories of President Kennedy as I watch this man stand up to the Cabal and literally drain the swamp! As I research and uncover these truths, I am appreciative of my ability to be flexible in my thinking and flow with new heroic clarity, when it appears to me in a way I cannot ignore. I’m staying open for new information daily, and feeling like my sight has improved immensely.

    • Hi Sherri! Interesting to see you here. Thank you for your kind words about my hair! And I am glad that
      you resonate with the idea of heroic clarity and feel that you have found it when it comes to our President.
      I admire you for researching and uncovering truths in an atmosphere that is not geared to make this easy to accomplish.

      Thank you for reading and commenting! Hope you return!

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