Navigating & Accepting

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What an emotional week it has been for me and I’m imagining for you, as well.  I’m still feeling less energy because of the trip I took to my niece’s wedding which is now a fond memory.  I wrote at length about it last week. In contrast, this will be a short post, but I really wanted to reach out to you, my community of readers and commenters!

I wanted to tell you how important community and connection have been to me. They’ve been helping me accept and navigate these big emotional feelings of sadness and despair.

If your experience is like mine, you’ve probably been receiving a ton of emails telling you what you should or even must do now. But the truth is, everyone is different, so this post is not about that. It’s about what’s helping me, and if it helps to inspire you to do what will help you, that will make me happy!

I’ve been logging on at 7 AM to a group called Grounding in the Heart, led by a teacher I trust in Ithica, New York. She leads a group of people who reside mostly in her community. Her skill is helping us contact and express our deep feelings. She shares meaningful guided meditations, poems and songs of comfort.

I’ve been talking with one of my sisters.

Connecting with my sons.

Reading reflections by other bloggers I respect.

Accepting my partner’s sensitive silence instead of shutting him out because we have different perspectives on what has happened.

Eating dinner with a dear friend where we vented before moving on to other topics and savoring a delicious meal.

Signing up for a three hour Zen retreat to sit with others on Saturday.

Making an appointment with a friend I want to get to know better for a Zoom call next Thursday.

Exploring poems that to use in the third of six Women Warriors Write session.

Signing on and participating with the group who practice Tai Chi Chih and Seijaku twice a week.

When I write all this down, it seems like a lot. I suddenly realize that perhaps I’ve been using activity as a way of avoiding my feelings – a pattern that is very engrained in my psyche. It’s quite difficult to change many years of conditioning. Writing to you and talking to my editor (Mason) helped me face this habit-pattern once more even though initially when it was suggested, I denied it. Now I’m going to go take a nap after I finalize this post.

If you have other ways of being in community, of feeling the support of others, please let me know. I hope hearing from me this week is helpful and if it is, feel free to reach out and tell me your ideas.

If I don’t hear from you, I’ll imagine you are doing just what you need to do right now to care for yourself and your loved ones.

IMAGE: One of my favorite fall pictures.

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