I Hit Send!

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On Monday, as I put the finishing touches on the manuscript for my second memoir, and right before hitting the send button, I was bombarded with all sorts of feelings which I chose not to take the time to sort out right then. I yelled out to Wendell in the other room: “Sent!” He replied, “Good for you!”

Considering my history with poetry – I mostly have not understood what poets were trying to say – it was amazing to me that when I did take time to recognize the elation, fear, dread, relief, self-doubt, all the feelings that were there when I hit send I remembered a poem Rachel had used in a Wild Writing group, “The Patience of Ordinary Things,” by Pat Schneider. I’m going to need patience, I told myself, as I wait to hear from the managing editor.  

I then recalled two of Schneider’s books I read several years ago. I went downstairs to find them. Clutching her books in my arms, I googled her, discovering that she passed away in 2020. Feeling the loss, I opened one of her books and read this line: “The beginning of the end is a beginning.”

Sending the completed manuscript had felt like the beginning of the end. There will be proofs to go over and cover decisions to be made so I know I am not done entirely. But here’s the thing: sending the manuscript led me to begin thinking of my next book. So I guess it is also a beginning? Isn’t that what this line of poetry says? I love how a poet can say so much in so few words!  

What is your relationship with poetry? I’d love to know. It will help me as I continue to explore this new world. Thanks for reading and commenting.

IMAGE: Volunteer Moss Roses growing in less than a half-inch of soil!

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