The immediacy of loss catapulted me into a different state of consciousness.
To describe this different state of consciousness, I do not have to use mystical or esoteric language. I only have to say that the majority of my bodily senses are wide open: the sun seems brighter, my essential oils smell more potent, and a hug feels life-sustaining. My sense of taste, on the other hand, has shut down and nothing tastes good; my sense of hearing doesn’t want sound other than silence.
Add these senses all together and the outcome is an increased awareness of being in a body. And when I’m in my body, it is easier to pay attention to my breathing.
In Post #96, we looked at matching words with our inhalations and with our exhalations. I shared the words I chose and invited you to create your own set. I hope you have benefited from your words.
The last few days I have continued to use “Be Present” for my inhalation. Because of Jo’s ability to be in the Now right to the end, my desire to be present is even more ferocious than before.
I’ve begun to vary my word for the exhalation. Lately “Trust” has surfaced as a word with meaning. Trust my feelings. Trust exploring the mystery. Trust the bond I shared with Jo continues albeit in a different form. Trust I will be able to die in a manner that won’t burden others.
In this, Post #100, I invite you to discover new words for your exhalations and inhalations if you choose.
Or each day, pick a sense that you want to pay attention to and see what effect it has on your enjoyment of life.
I so appreciate those of you who share your comments. You might want to go to the blog and see what other readers are saying. Please let me know which sense helps you feel alive and aware.
Thanks for exploring the mystery – Nicky Mendenhall
2 comments
As a competitive golf enthusiast, my breathing is tempered with nervousness and different momentums of timing. There is specific time in the exhale when nerves and energy must be released. In practicing over many buckets of balls without stopping for a real, cleansing deep breath, blood pressure and overall pressure builds. Why is every ball flight slightly different? How could I miss such an easy shot? Should I release to right field, or left? How far is my turning radius today? How does that stiff neck I woke up with going to affect my yardage? You get the idea that there are a hundred questions that are constantly going in and out of my brain/body that I need to monitor and somehow quiet when it is time to swing.
The idea of taking in a breath with a kind, or hopeful word sounds to me a perfect "getting ready" point for the final decent to that small object I'm trying to perfectly squish against the ground into the air. "Trust" on the exhale hopefully will replace the indecision and nervousness that sometimes strangles the best intentions and confidence it takes to complete the swing. Thanks for the post and I'll let you know soon how it works for me!
Hello Anon – now that I know who you are! Thanks for a great idea. Think of the possibilities – if it works for golf – might it work for other endeavors?
Be sure and let me know how it works!
Comments are closed.