My writing teacher’s teacher, Deena Metzger, advises writing in the field you are in.
Musing on this idea after class, I discovered myself eight years old, standing in dad’s corn field yearning for God to call my name. One of the neighbor boys got lost in the cornfield and was certain God had called his name. Actually, it was the sheriff using a megaphone but still, I wanted to have that special feeling for myself.
Leaving the field of memory, my eyes narrowed as I suddenly realized this long-held memory was further evidence of what I had learned in Freudian psychoanalysis: Then, as now, I wanted and needed to feel special. I write about this in Fear, Folly & Freud.
It is vital to have a clear picture of your current field. This allows you to choose where you want to place your attention.
One day in writing class we wrote in response to “Thinking” a poem by Danusha Lameris. I am going to share what I wrote as it helped me get clear about what was in my field that day. Remember that I wrote this as fast as I could, following Laurie Wagner’s encouragement to “write as poorly as possible” and “let your belly hang over your jeans.” Enjoy!
“Everything seems to be speeding up. Asking my husband to drive me to the apt because when I am finished being treated, I don’t feel like driving. It seems like I just asked him but it was 8 weeks ago. A day in March. A day that I remember as being about the same temperature as today – but today wasn’t as windy. Everything seems to be speeding up, I am wondering how the Psyllium Seed I’m mixing with applesauce is really working as I can’t yet talk or share what it’s for and it doesn’t speed things up too much and for that I’m grateful. I feel like the Homeowner’s Association is speeding up the conflict about a dues increase. We have a new bulletin most every other day. Why is a former minister of my deceased parents on what I feel is the bad guys’ side? Everything seems to be speeding up except the clock in the treatment room this morning whose battery had died. Don’t you wish that the vote was over for the dues increase? Don’t you wish the Supreme Court had different judges? Don’t you wonder how everything will turn out? As I write that I recall how my father said he didn’t want to die because he wanted to see how things would turn out.”
If you like the idea of knowing what field you are in, set a timer for fifteen minutes, and using the prompt, “everything seems to be speeding up” write what comes through your pen. Say yes to it all. Don’t stop. Go back to the prompt if you feel stuck.
Thanks for reading!
The image is of my backyard on a sunny morning.
